Transactional Analysis in Ireland

Friday, November 14, 2003

TAI Meeting FEAR AND ANXIETY November 14 2003

Hand out of meeting held at Glenlyon, Knocklyon, Dublin 16

FEAR AND ANXIETY (including Compulsive and Addictive Behaviour)

Write down three fears you have experienced in your life on three Post-its. Choose a partner and tell them about them. If you are willing put some or all of them on the poster.

What is FEAR?
Present moment
Based on reality as we perceive it at that moment
In Adult with strong Child influence (Fight or Flight Freeze , Flow or Fun) and strong Parent influence of protection.
Needs management –
identifying and prioritizing needs of situation
choice/rejection of behaviours from Adult,

What is ANXIETY?
Based in future
In Child and/or Parent with little Adult influence
Needs control:
Possible, Probable or Definite (Being Objective = getting into Adult)
Command muscles to move, or not to move
Stop complaining, talk about it from your Adult.
Be kind to the Scared Child part of yourself.

Something I tell myself I HAVE TO do
Anxiety about some consequences if I don’t do this thing
Discount of other consequences if I decide not to do this thing.

Child in control. Magical thinking that if I do/avoid this thing, I will be protected from harm, and if I don’t do it, something terrible will happen to me.
Needs Parent reassurance that nothing bad is going to happen if the behaviour is stopped and that protection is available.
Needs Adult information and decision making (identifying and prioritizing needs of situation, choice/rejection of behaviours from Adult)

Extreme or irrational fear or dislike of something

Something I tell myself I CANNOT STOP doing.
Anxiety about certain consequences if I stop doing this.
Total discount of other consequences if I continue to do this.

Needs Adult information and decision making (identifying and prioritizing needs of situation, choice/rejection of behaviours from Adult)
Needs Parent reassurance that protection is available, that that the discomfort involved in stopping the behaviour is manageable, and will be temporary.

Sort the following behaviours (Listed on Post-its) under the headings:
1. You have begun to cross the road when a car comes around the corner to your right at ninety miles an hour.
2. You wash all the white woodwork in your house every day.
3. You leave your work-desk hourly to go out in the rain to smoke a cigarette
4. You stare out the window instead of studying because you are afraid of failing to do well in a forthcoming examination.
5. You scream when a mugger puts a knife to your throat.
6. You straighten the pictures in someone else’s house.
7. You refuse to go into a bedroom where you saw a spider six months ago.
8. You immediately buy a pair of shoes that attracts you, even though you know you had intended to spend the money on schoolbooks for your child.
9. You are asked to read to a group and sweat trickles down your back. You say you have forgotten your glasses.
10. You miss out a trip to the Empire State Building because you are afraid of heights (The platform is enclosed in glass)
11. You always stay at home while other members of your family do the shopping.
12. You are invited to talk to TAI for ten minutes and you spend six hours preparing a one page script.

Discuss which other headings that they might be put under
Notice that there is a continuum between normal and abnormal fears and anxieties.


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